One way

I fancy him
he fancies me not
I am relieved
He is working
We met
(The other day)
Our eyes met
our gazes did not
Fucking hell
As if back-end
body processes
Hit a speed bump
The breathing stopped
the body was zapped
The mind yearned
for an illicit affair
But alas
His awkward smile
My solemn acknowledgment
Of wild nights
that would have been
But the fateful night
that was
And the day after
when drunken haze
Of previous night
Had faded.
Lets give it time
he had said
I am not
emotionally equipped
He says now
I sometimes wish
He was drunk forever
And then perhaps
he would sense
my one way lust.